“What makes humility so desirable is the marvelous thing it does to us; it creates in us a capacity for the closest possible intimacy with God” – Monica Baldwin

Humility, something so often desired, yet so rarely achieved. Humility, the act of being humble. I think Mr. Webster defined humility the best, “The quality or state of being humble.”

What is humility exactly? I know Mr. Webster has provided an apt definition for us, but yet, after reading that, I’m still at loss. What is being humble? How does one achieve this beautiful state? People so often say “I’m working on being humble.” But really, in a sense have they not failed at that if they feel the pressing need to tell people this? Is not humility, the quality of state of being humble, best expressed through actions unnoticed by others?

What brings me to this point of discussing humility is the fact that it is a life long quest. I think of people who are humble in my opinion. If I were to say to them “You are a very humble person,” they would most inevitably state that they still had room to grow. How could this be? As I think about it more, as I contemplate this ever continuing, most beautiful state, I realize that one can never be humble enough when faced with the vast greatness of God. These men and women in my life that I consider humble, consider themselves proud and arrogant before the Almighty God. I have to concede that this is true. God always has a way of bringing the humble in the sight of man, to a place of arrogance in the sight of God. When faced with the cross, we have no choice but to be humbled.

I have been thinking about this frequently. Mainly because God has been using my own self-inadequacies in the light of his glory to humble me. What do I mean by this? The past several months I have been straying from the promises of God. For those of you that don’t know, I plan on going to medical school. I am certain beyond a doubt that this is the path that God has called me to. Several years ago, I went on a missions trip to Mexico, and while there, we were asked to pray and seek God and what he would have us do with what we saw, what we learned while there. I really didn’t sense that God was saying anything to me except “Keep doing what you are doing. I want you to be a doctor for Me.” (note, that wasn’t verbatim, more of a general summary). So here it is, the promise of God to me. Now fast forward to this year. I am now in the most dreaded phase of applying to medical school and taking the MCAT. I have constantly been looking upon my own self, and seeing that I am inadequate for this adventure. Consequently, this thought process sends me into a spiral of despair. Then, one Sunday, Pastor Rob of Calvary Corvallis spoke on Romans 4. The passage that hit me so hard was thus :

(as it is written, “I have made you a father of many nations”[d]) in the presence of Him whom he believed—God, who gives life to the dead and calls those things which do not exist as though they did; 18 who, contrary to hope, in hope believed, so that he became the father of many nations, according to what was spoken, “So shall your descendants be.”[e] 19 And not being weak in faith, he did not consider his own body, already dead (since he was about a hundred years old), and the deadness of Sarah’s womb. 20 He did not waver at the promise of God through unbelief, but was strengthened in faith, giving glory to God, 21 and being fully convinced that what He had promised He was also able to perform. – Romans 4:17-21

I was so convicted so to speak, and humbled by this. I remembered that God is capable of doing things that do not yet exist, i.e. “Calls those things which do not exist as though they did.” I had been focusing on my own person so much, that I lost sight of the promise of God. Abraham did just the opposite as is seen in verse 19, and what happened?? He didn’t waver at the promise of God, and was strengthened in faith. I realized that I had begun to think that my abilities were better than God, and as I continued farther down the path, I realized that my abilities and accomplishments were not that great for medical school. Then I heard this. God was telling me, don’t focus on you, focus on me. So I shifted my focus, and WOW. The vastness and the greatness of God and his sovereign power just brought me to my knees so to speak. Nothing that I have done, or will do is anything compared to what God WILL do.

Then again, this week I was at Real Life (my college ministry I attend) and the discussion was about marriage. Now, at this point in my life, I’m getting to the point where I no longer want to be single. and Ian Nelson, the college pastor started teaching out Genesis 2 to begin the evening. Once, again, the first few minutes of the message, I just felt horribly stupid, cause I knew that those words were directed at me. Once again, I had discounted the timing, and the awesomeness of God, this time in my desire to meet that special someone. I was rushing God! How can I do that?? I can’t! God is not rushed. When we get ahead of his timing, we are hosed. Ian said something my parents had said to me a million times, but this time it sank in. He said “If you think you’ve found that special someone in your life, just sit back and relax and trust God. There is no hurry, right?” (Once again, not verbatim). Haha, that was somewhat directed at me. I was once again humbled. I find that this is happening over and over again.

So I look at these two examples, and then think about the quote I started this blog off with, and realize how true those words are!!! Through my lessons in humility with the Almighty God, I have grown so much closer to Him. Humility is an ever dynamic thing. It is different for each person, different for each situation, because obtaining humility requires the act of being humble. The act of being humbled requires us looking into the face of Christ and realizing that we are nothing.

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